January 27, 2013

I’m moving, interwebs…

By Sarah ¶ Posted in home ¶ 3 Comments

Hi friends! I am finishing up my second year at this blog and have been doing a lot of evaluating and thinking and introspecting and planning and all that good stuff. One thing I have realized is that I love blogging. I have always been a journaler and actually having people respond and interact is so fun! I have also realized that being able to connect with my far away family is priceless. I love the relationships with family that have grown through this place. I love it so much it makes me all teary eyed and sentimental just thinking about it. So how do I make the change I want to make without losing all of that?

I started this blog when I had a big question mark in my life. A lot was changing and I was seeking to do a lot of things that didn’t work out. Have you ever thought that people were drifting all around you and you thought you were doing the right thing to keep them close only to create the opposite situation? That’s pretty much what happened. The cost was high for a “free” blog, if you know what I mean. Consequently, though I love blogging, the very name of this site reminds me of lost friendships, sad times, and that huge question mark that hovered over me at the time I started writing here. I can’t carry that around with me anymore. I feel like I have addressed it in my own heart, have said what I need to say to those I needed to speak to, and now it’s time for me to let it go. I was reading this post by my friend Rachel and had a moment of such clarity. I need to find a way to say goodbye to that time and let it go. For this spot, it means stopping here and starting over somewhere else. Rachel has taught me a lot about that too. You should read her blog. It comes more from the heart than any other blog I read.

I feel nervous, as I do with any change, and I am excited. Mostly, I hope you guys will come with me. My new place is small with bare walls and not a lot of flair but that’s what I’m liking right now. It’s simple. The future is mine to mess with and who knows what will be there? I’ll still be wifing, mothering, dog training, knitting, nursing (as in the healthcare kind, not the breast kind), over sharing what’s on my mind, and appreciating all of you. Will you come with me?

I’ll leave this site active since WordPress holds your content hostage when you try to leave. I tried the converter but apparently, I have too much content.

So here goes…

my new place is www.sarahnadeblog.com

I hope you’ll come see me over there!

January 7, 2013

Oh, hello again!

By Sarah ¶ Posted in everyday business, home ¶ 3 Comments

Well, hello there! Happy New Year and welcome back to the “real world.” This holiday season was sort of different and having entered it with the loss of Carl and then the tragedy in Connecticut, I just had tears bubbling right under the surface the whole time. I cried at my kids’ Christmas pageant because I couldn’t stop thinking about all the mommies and daddies that had their little ones taken from them by violence. I cried when I went to work looking at all these mentally ill people that we don’t have the resources to help and cried when I thought about our overburdened healthcare system and what the future is going to look like. I really felt so exhausted the whole month but in the midst of it I felt a most profound sense of gratitude that I probably haven’t felt so strongly in a long time. I am often thinking about the future and my wants… bigger yard, more time with my kids, more babies, less hours at work…but this last month I kept thinking THANK YOU. This life is fleeting and is to be treasured and, for that reason, I decided to live in it presently and purposefully without thinking about photos or what I was going to write about it. I do write these things down because obviously I enjoy writing and I want to connect with my distant family members and I want my kids to have memories recorded with stories and photos attached but sometimes, I need to put it all down and just be with my family.

It was a great month and as I sent the big kids off to school this morning I had a major pang of sadness and my house is way too quiet right now. I’m counting the days until President’s Weekend when they have their next break!

Here’s some of what we did on our break. These are my Instagram photos and you can follow me there if you want! I’m @sarahracine and would love to see you over there.

I upped my knitting game this Christmas. These chevrons were really fun and I felt pretty awesome about making them successfully without poking myself in the eye with a knitting needle or some other drastic act of frustration.

In honor of treat yo’ self 2012, I bought us a new address stamp with arrows and fancy lettering. It made my card addressing and mailing so much easier.

This dude totally had a nervous freak out before the play (he had a very long monologue) and threw up in the bathroom but powered through, conquered his fears and rocked his Simeon robe like a boss.

Mike and I took a glass blowing class which was one of my favorite dates with him ever. My glass is better in case you’re wondering.

Cookie baking, obviously…

Liam was the official candy cane crusher and asked for a rubber mallet for Christmas. Santa did NOT honor that request. Maybe next year.

Mad’s letter to Santa specifically said,”wrap my presents in pretty packages” so…

Sugar plums dancing in his head on Christmas Eve. Probably more like guinea pigs in tutus.

Christmas dinner at Mom’s house

Sunset on Christmas day

This chick is a gamer and she killed us in UNO. Check out her face. No mercy.

My friend Amber gave us some tickets to the Science Center so we had breakfast and saw an IMAX movie and hung out there. Best day ever FYI.

The boys got bikes for Christmas and my Uncle and Aunt gave them gift cards so they got new helmets too. I did a lot of supervising. Thank you Aunt Sue and Uncle Dale!

There was a lot of progress in puppy training this month but she seems to think we’re just kidding when we tell her she can’t be on the furniture.

Oh, I got an iPad for Christmas. Holla!

After I finished making Christmas presents, I got to pick up this adorable crewel kit my mother in law gave me. It’s so stinking cute.

These guys…

This dog…

I mean..

I hope you all had a happy and healthy holiday season and I am looking forward to the New Year and sharing it with you!

Hebrews 10:23

Let us hold fast the confession of our hope without wavering, for he who promised is faithful.

December 7, 2012

I Like Christmas

By Sarah ¶ Posted in everyday business ¶ 8 Comments

I love Christmas decorations. I love the traditions, the memories, the festivity, and *duh* twinkle lights. I had lights up in my bedroom in high school and college year round so my love for twinkle lights has been a looooooooong affair. This is the one time of year I can plaster them everywhere without feeling like I’m back in the dorms (don’t get me wrong, dorm life was awesome, it’s just that I’m 34 now…so…I’m a grown up or whatever).

Last year I did a post on my Christmas decoration finds from the thrift store which is one of my very most favorite places to score awesome decorations. You can cruise over there with 10 bucks in your pocket and come out with an arm load of sparkly twinkly elfin goodness. This year, we used a lot of acorns and pinecones and branches we have collected over the last few months and I like the look of them and the kids like seeing their collections out on display. Anyway, I wanted to show you some stuff, so here you go…(picture me doing a dramatic sweeping arm gesture Vanna White style)

The tree…it’s a beast but Stella likes being able to creep under there and drink up all the water.

I like this nativity because Mary is holding the baby. I don’t think the idea that she left Jesus in a manger while strangers from afar were staring at him is very realistic. I think this is more accurate. If you were entrusted with the care of the Savior, wouldn’t you hold him close? I think yes.

This is my favorite ornament. It’s a refrigerator AND a Christopher Radko so it’s legit.

This is some vintage crewel work I thrifted last week for 3 dollars. I seriously love it and may have shouted gleefully in the store.

This was another thrifted goodie. It’s not only the world’s most adorable deer, it’s a whistle. I know, right?

Thanks for stopping by! I hope your Christmas season is filled with fun and maybe a winking Santa night light or a deer whistle.

PS- this is a linky doodle dandy with Harper’s Happenings. You can see Mandy’s decorations here . While you’re there, poke around a little bit. She’s one of my favorites.

December 2, 2012

New Beginnings…

By Sarah ¶ Posted in home ¶ 6 Comments

“When the Man waked up he said,
‘What is Wild Dog doing here?’
And the Woman said,
‘His name is not Wild Dog any more,
but the First Friend,
because he will be our friend
for always and always and always.’”
- Rudyard Kipling

This is Stella. We hope to be able to love her as long as we were blessed to love Carl and maybe even longer…

December 1, 2012

Simply Put, Thanksgiving

By Sarah ¶ Posted in everyday business, home ¶ 5 Comments

I wanted to share a little about our Thanksgiving since it’s December 1st and the second Thanksgiving is over, it seems to be long forgotten. I feel like Thanksgiving is the poor neglected middle child of the Holiday season hopelessly sandwiched between Halloween and Christmas which are the biggie holidays for kids because they get stuff and they’re only human, after all. We have found that we have a lot more fun on this holiday when we leave town and head to my grandma’s cabin in the mountains of Northern California. It’s good for us to get away and be surrounded by beautiful country, colorful trees, and loving family. Of course, there is an awesome fireplace too which is icing on the cake. My grandpa got to come home from his nursing facility for the day (you can read more about him here) so we got spend some time with him and I am so thankful for every little hug I get from him. We hiked, did puzzles, read stories, foraged around in the woods, ate a ton of good food, and played lots of Yahtzee. It was a wonderful few days and even though it was eclipsed by our loss of Carl, we made some great family memories.

Happy Thanksgiving from us!

November 26, 2012

Long May You Run

By Sarah ¶ Posted in home ¶ 19 Comments

“It is always said that however many wonderful and happy years a dog lives, you know that one day, the day he dies, your dog will break your heart.”

James Herriot

Yesterday I found myself sitting on a couch in the vet’s office clutching my 11 year old boxer and wondering how I got there. I noticed every detail…the fancy couch for us to sit on for our goodbyes, the travertine tiles, the sound proof door, the hushed voices since everyone knew exactly why we were there. I stroked his fur which was coming out in clumps in my hand and I just kept wondering how on earth we got there. He was fine a couple weeks ago…but old age is like that. It just decides to take you and there’s nothing to be done.

I know every one thinks their dog is best but in this case, it wasn’t just me that thought Carl was something special. Carl was one of those dogs that never had to wear a collar because the whole neighborhood knew him. He would slip out the front door to go to the bus stop to see the kids there and the moms knew exactly where to bring him home. He was a fixture in the front of our house content to lay on the porch while we worked in the yard, washed cars, or played with the kids. All my friends knew Carl, my parents treated him like another grandchild, and my next door neighbor’s baby would come out of the house looking for el perrito.

Carl was the first to greet my babies when I brought each of them through the door from the hospital. He patiently slept beside me when I was sick. He was fiercely protective of me during all of my pregnancies. He once ate a pack of cigarettes and a bag of hershey’s kisses and lived to tell the tale. He never went to bed until I did. He stole 20 bucks from me and hid it in his dog house. He used to poop in the ocean so I couldn’t get it with a bag. He posed for every annoying picture I ever asked him to be in. He would find the tiniest ray of light and try to lay in it. He was loyal, faithful, and loving even at the end when I knew he was so uncomfortable.

So you can imagine the heart break as we sat there, in that quiet room in the vet’s office saying goodbye to our old man and wishing it was a bad dream. Even as the vet was injecting him my heart was saying,” STOP!!!” but my mind knew it was the right thing to do. I wanted to be selfish and keep him here forever but I knew we had loved him whole heartedly from the second we clamped eyes on him and it was time for his suffering to end. Unfortunately, that means we have to suffer…for awhile anyway, as we nurse our broken hearts. I feel so honored that I got to love that dog. He was a gift every second he lived under my roof and as he went to sleep for the last time, all I could think was “thank you…”. We can’t imagine our lives without him, because we haven’t been without him. He was with us as newlyweds and now, we have to feel what it’s like to be us without him. I have a million happy memories and they’re all playing in my mind as I heal. Because of these memories, I know this sadness is worth it.

Thank you, my sweet boy. I’ll love you forever.